Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
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