Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
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