Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Randomize
