I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
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