i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Randomize
