yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
