sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
Randomize
