Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
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