So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
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