Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize
