yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
