so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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