u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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