Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(207): View more from Maine

I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.

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(703): View more from Virginia

Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.

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(952): View more from Minnesota

Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.

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19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
Read it at the TFLN blog
(404): View more from Georgia

dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere

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(207): View more from Maine

I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?

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(360): View more from Washington

Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'

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(763): View more from Minnesota

We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"

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(720): View more from Colorado

The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.

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