To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Reggie can tackle my bush.
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
