So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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