Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Dignity is for republicans.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
Randomize