i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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