so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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