Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
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