I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
Randomize
