worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
How external is "for external use only"?
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
Randomize
