so explain again why im purple
no
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Randomize
