It's a beautiful day for a hangover
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
Randomize
