Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
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