haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
