is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
This can only be settled by a dance off.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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