he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
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