You smell like a Billy Joel song
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
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