Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
Randomize
