Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
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