I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Randomize
