We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
