whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Randomize
