oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Maybe he injected his testicle?
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Randomize
