he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Randomize