the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Randomize
