Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Randomize
