The best revenge is premature balding
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
