I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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