I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
