pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
Randomize
