you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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