He told me they were just razor bumps!
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize