fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
