You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
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He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
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