Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
Dick very happy bro
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize
