I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
why is half of my head shaved?
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