Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
