why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
